It’s been almost a year, but nonetheless I sit here in awe when i reflect back on how insurmountable the situation seemed at the time. My thoughts had turned so negative and had been brewing for so long, that they truly became my reality- what appeared like a difficult albeit doable situation, seemed so dark and hopeless at that time.
1) Is it accurate? Will I really have to raise the kids on your own (Their father may not be living with all of us but is still around)?
2) Can I absolutely know it is true? Is that a verified truth
3) How do I react when I think that thought? Completely freaked out and overly- responsible
4) Who would I end up being without the thought? Much more relaxed, less anxious and… free
I was intelligent, passionate and innovative. I had evidence of this based on my career and ability to persevere from difficult situations in the past. That was also a fact.
It also assisted to ask myself the question “what if everything I feared arrived true? ” When I really thought about it, the worst case scenario I created was that my children would have to briefly move in with their father until I got on my feet and I might have to live in my Suburban for a while, showering and dressing at the gym (if I used to be able to hold onto a gym membership). Granted this scenario was a bit intense, but if it came down to it was an option and I could do it. My kids might have food, shelter and love and I would have the ability to go out and find work. Is it ideal? No . But would certainly I be safe, somewhat comfy (it was winter in COMPANY at the time) and in a temporary scenario? Yes.
You know how in the past you’ve purchased something, generally a book or motivational program hoping it would change your life and then once you were done reading it, benefit you experienced during the “lesson” would certainly level off within in a few days and you’d go back to thinking and acting like the same person you were prior to? I personally have experienced this time and time again. You actually have to step out of the comfort zone and put the lessons into practice. You have to do the work! It’s not the reading and studying of the materials that guarantees you success, it is the re-wiring of your brain which will change your life. If you want to change your existence, change the way you think. I’ve read it time and time again and when I lastly put it in place for myself and put the lessons into practice, everything looked so much different. A really good different!
Author’ ersus Bio:
Dominique is a two time divorce survivor, single mother of 4 and a Divorce and Wellness Coach.